Just recently, I had someone close to me have a sudden health crisis; one that almost ended their life. The amazing thing was, that when this happened, I saw this person much more clearly for what she had done in her life; not for who she was, so much. It more than occurred to me that she was an awesome mother, a courageous soul and a real giver. Not much had been given her in life, and she also had big long running challenges; but she stood the test of time, and kept giving, and will hopefully yet again, recover. I suppose she succumbed to the load that must come to those who give much, and take little.
What I am trying to say, is that we don’t seem to see people clearly until they are gone, or unless they may be heading out of here suddenly. It seems we don’t really see each other until the end, or in crisis, and I have to ask…Why is that?
It would seem a waste, because of the fact that we loose the insights of a unique human soul that we did not value, and maybe we haven’t treated them according to their true worth, while they are here. We tend to not notice each other somehow. We do not see the courage, the compassion, the support that someone brought, etc etc. We do not see the noble creature, and what they actually did. That was the biggest insight I was given… That it was all about what they actually did for others, and very little else.
I see in this person none of her faults, I just feel my love for her, and see the noble creature that seems to have manifested itself to me, in this difficult time; shown itself clearly. I suppose givers tend to suffer in silence, but it is more than that. I believe we really don’t see the value of a human life, and what it can produce, and I am now sure, even though I knew it theologically, that a human life is measured in actions; mainly our of actions of love.
A person can seem far less than they are, because the load they carry may make them a little negative, hard or bitter, or whatever else heavy loads manifest as in someones behaviour. Even the personality seems not to be a consideration, when seeing the nobility of a soul very clearly and present, due to a death or sudden illness. The support and gifts given by this soul, to me, was very clear, and a wondrously beautiful thing.
Love is a wondrous and beautiful thing, as it comes to us in the gifts and sacrifice of others.
What I suppose I am saying is, that maybe we are better taking a real look at others, and ourselves, in this light. It may be very telling, and may be very clarifying, about the nature of a person’s nobility, worth and measure. Maybe we can see ourselves and others more clearly. Maybe too, we can look after better, those who we start to see more clearly.
I am not saying all are saints, or that the motives of anyone is clear in an action, or that it is okay to be a grump because you gave at the office. I believe there are many behaviours that lessen our measure. What I am saying, is that what is inside us, shows outside us, and to me now, the evidence and nature of measure is more clear; if we wish to see it.